Mother’s Day 2018

I never really have been one for Mother’s Day. My sister and my mother really get along much better than my mother and I do. I don’t seem to be the one anybody calls anymore. I got up this morning and I had a note from my mom wishing me a happy Mother’s Day. Well, not really a happy Mother’s Day, she said she was thinking about me and that she loves me. I’ve really been thinking a lot about my mother recently too. Anyway, I wrote her back, not the usual, too long of a message, that I usually do, but this:

I think of you everyday. I love you too. I know I’m not the daughter that you always wanted, but let’s take today and make it a day of mutual understanding and respect. I do understand and respect you. I wish you did me.

One day, I wish…

Well she immediately says she does and gets off and goes to church. No confrontation again. Nothing accomplished again. Nothing’s ever going to be either. I don’t understand why it’s so hard to express your feelings. You just do it! There’s no right or wrong way to do it you just fucking do it. But m never going to get my mother to do what I want her to do.  She is never going to acknowledge her wrongs until she’s ready, its not for me to do. It’s her journey. I have to remember I can’t change anyone! I keep forgetting, lol…



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