Today, I Will Have My Answers…

As it happens I have a short term memory problem. This came into play when I was asked by Bari to be her wingman Halloween 2014. William had been gone slightly over a year. I had not been OUT since then.

The sound I heard that morning? I lost 95% of the hearing in my left ear. That is for another day…anyway that noise. I’d learned the signs. The way he looked at me when he walked in the kitchen that beautiful summer morning. I didn’t give the look any concern. I was looking at him like a boss. Well, a lot more than that, he’d made to me that morning for the last time.

I cant keep on the way I have been. I need to cope with the reality and come to an understanding. Process my thoughts and find peace and acceptance in my heart. I relive every moment, every second. I was giddy and glad to be Mrs WBF. That man was our family. Mine and Miss E’s.¬†Now, 4 years later, I hear a noise, 2500 miles from where William, a 49 year old marksman, among a hundred other things, placed a black talon bullet in the camber and execution style, between his eyes. ¬†Since that day, I still feel dead. I believe I’m in the anger stage of grief, I think.

Twould vindicate my actions for the last four years.

I was just remembering good times. I know we had a badsomewhere, but not enough to do that. I know he is my twin flame. I hurt him in another life and then I committed suicide.because my heart and thoughts were and always will with him and him with me.

I heard a noise just now. I immediately think of Miss E. ¬†I’m speculating on how it would have been. Miss E was almost 2 weeks into college. The noise was heaven to my ears, not really. . N Korea flying mi Jap


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