Rapid Cycling…

OK, I got arrested for beating up my friend. It cost me $300. Therefore, I couldn’t afford to refill my meds. So, I’m freaking the fuck out! My mind is going 90 miles an hour and will not slow down. My only comfort is at night with Trazadone. I starting driving my friend to work today, which is nice. I have some things to do tomorrow and I don’t have to ask anyone to drive me.

Actually, I can’t wait until tomorrow. I’ve already paid all my bills, made my grocery list and I’ll hit the pharmacy first thing. The bonus is I get my hair done. Now girls, we all know it’s the bomb. I’ll get to relax, get a new me and dish out a lot of money. But it’s worth it, right? Maybe I’ll get my nails done too. Oh, forgot I still have to pay the lawyer for the speeding ticket I got, UGH.

Thank God my friend smokes. He left a pack in the car. I don’t know if they’ll be any left when I pick him up. Don’t worry it’s an extra pack. I’ll get vapor tomorrow too, oh and a new battery. Fuck my money is already gone. I want to crawl in a hole. I’m so sick of everything. Calgon, take me away!!!!!

In this process of losing William, I’ve been taking notes and doing some writings. My memories are so clear. I’m writing a book. Wow, I know. Who’d have thought. A crazy woman writing book. Well, it’s going to be pretty crazy too. I read some to my daughter and she was intrigued. So I guess I’m on the right track. Time will tell.

I just wish I could stop spinning…